Successful Communication in Marriage
Why We Communicate:
- Basic information
- Partnership / needs
- Conflict resolution
- Connection
- Personal information / revelation
- Intimate communication
When communication fails on any level, every level is affected or shut off completely.
Our needs are different by God’s design.
Women
Security
Open & honest communication
Soft, non-sexual affection
Leadership
Men
Honor
Sex
Friendship
Domestic support
Five Keys to Successful Communication in Marriage:
1. The right tone
Tone communicates care.
We hear through our deepest needs:
Men = Honor
Women = Security
Five Keys to Successful Communication in Marriage:
2. Enough time
Three Types of Time Needed for Effective Communication:
- Proactive communication time – approx. 3-5 days per year
- Personal communication time — approx. 30-60 minutes per day
- Intimate communication time
Five Keys to Successful Communication in Marriage:
3. An atmosphere of trust
Trust is the key ingredient that allows us to open our hearts to each other.
Genesis 2:24-25 NKJV
Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
Five Keys to Successful Communication in Marriage:
4. The truth spoken in love
Ephesians 4:15 NIV
Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ.
John 1:14
The word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.
How to Create a Safe Environment for Conflict Resolution:
- Give your spouse the right to complain without paying a price.
- Complain and don’t criticize. Begin with affirmation and love.
- Validate and forgive. Get help if necessary!
Five Keys to Successful Communication in Marriage:
5. A team spirit
How to Develop a Team Spirit:
- Be honest about your own weaknesses.
- Praise your spouse’s differences.
- Seek their input, and always make decisions together.
